


Mission: Impossible

by dexsnursey (nerdy_farm_girl)



Series: Nurse [1]
Category: Check Please! (Webcomic)
Genre: Castle AU, Detectives, Fake/Pretend Relationship, M/M, Nursey Has Two Moms, and a kid, author nursey, background Charmer, brief description of a murder victim and cause of death, similar to cop shows
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-25
Updated: 2017-01-25
Packaged: 2018-09-19 21:59:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,526
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9461972
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nerdy_farm_girl/pseuds/dexsnursey
Summary: When Nurse asks Dex to be his fake boyfriend for the night, he probably should have said no. In fact, he probably should have said no over a year ago when Sgt. Duan asked him if acclaimed writer Derek Nurse could shadow him for a little while. But as usual, Dex has made all the wrong decisions.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by [this post](http://dexsnursey.tumblr.com/post/155694005834/snyderpretzels21-rilgwilym-castle-au-where), and written for [Helen](http://softholsom.tumblr.com). I hope you like this dear! Once again I have kind of sort of followed the prompt, whoops!
> 
> Also, I plan on writing more in this AU, both before and after this fic, because honestly there needs to be at least 50k of the slowest burn you've ever read.
> 
> All characters from the comic Check, Please! belong to Ngozi (thanks N!!!)
> 
> As I mentioned in the tags, there is a brief description of a murder victim and her cause of death. This is similar with what you would see on like CSI or something, with a lot less blood or details. On that note, you do not have to have ever watched Castle to understand this fic. In fact, I haven't watched it in ages so I'm only vaguely following what I can remember.

Dex doesn’t notice the way everyone is whispering for a longer period of time than should be necessary for a seasoned detective. But his desk is currently covered in paperwork, from the several open cases his team is currently working on, and honestly he was just kind of grateful that the assholes in his precinct weren’t being obnoxious as usual. However, Birkholtz being quiet for more than approximately thirty seconds makes the hair on the back of his neck stand up, and the eerie silence has been going on for almost two minutes. There’s a part of him that doesn’t even want to _know_ , but he is a police officer after all, and it’s kind of his job to know what’s going on.

He glances up over the stack of folders in front of him, immediately snapping to attention when he spots the reason for the quiet. There’s a little girl wandering towards his, Birkholtz’s and Chow’s desks from the elevator. A lone child is strange enough, but there’s something about the shape of her face and the thick curls pulled back in neat pigtails that makes her feel somehow familiar. But Dex doesn’t really _know_ any children, except for Chow’s twins (who are only a couple of months old, and certainly don’t yet have the motor function to wander into a police station). The girl wanders up to Birkholtz’s desk and pulls on his sleeve, hands going to her hips when he turns to looks at her.

“Are you Detective P’dexter?” She asks, chin tilted up toward Birkholtz. She really should have gone to Chow, because he would have been much more helpful than just shaking his head and pointing in Dex’s direction. Which is exactly what Birkholtz does.

The little girl turns towards Dex, her face lighting up, cheeks lifting with a big smile.

Dex contemplates thumping his head on his desk and groaning. Because he knows that smile, and he recognizes those green eyes, and he knows this child can only be the offspring of one particularly irritating person.

Nurse.

“Daddy says I should sit at your desk while he talks to Mommy,” the little girl says as she rounds Dex’s desk, unafraid as she leans heavily against Dex’s leg.

“Your Daddy… is Derek Nurse, right?” Dex asks, just to be sure. Letting some unidentified kid sit at his desk without getting any information would be a frankly terrible plan.

“Yup!” She pops the ‘p’, loudly, the same way Nurse does when he’s being a shit head. “My name is Angela Kimani Nurse, but Daddy just calls me Angel.” She grins up at him with that infectious little smile, and Dex can’t help but smile back.

“Nice to meet you Angela,” Dex says, because he’s not about to pick up Nurse’s nickname for his daughter without asking. “I’m Detective Poindexter, but you can call me Dex.”

“That’s a weird name,” Angela says as she hops up into the chair beside Dex’s desk, the same one her father occupies far more often than necessary. Dex isn’t about to admit that sometimes he finds himself staring at the chair when it’s empty, wishing for it to become occupied again. Having some author follow him around for book inspiration isn’t exactly on the top of his priority list, especially since said author is the most annoying person he’s ever met. Just because Derek Nurse is irrefutably handsome, and clever, and endearingly clumsy, doesn’t mean that Dex has to like him, okay?

“Well I’m a weird guy,” Dex replies honestly, sinking cautiously back into his chair. “Where _is_ your Dad?” He has to ask, not only because it’s very strange for a small child to be wandering around a police station alone, but also because this feels vaguely like a trap.

“He’s outside talking to Mommy,” Angela says matter of factly, grabbing a file off of his desk and flipping it open. Dex snatches it back, hoping to god she didn’t see the gruesome pictures inside. He works in the homicide division for Christ’s sake, children cannot be flipping through his files. Under normal circumstances, he’d probably be contemplating what exactly Derek Nurse is teaching his child, but he’s suddenly remembering that not only was he only vaguely aware that Nurse had a daughter, but this child also has a _mother_ , who is apparently in the vicinity. Dex isn’t proud of the panic that’s trying to claw its way up his throat, but the thing is, he has always been okay with Nurse dating people hypothetically. The guy’s famously a playboy, with socialites falling all over themselves to get a spot on his arm. But there is an actual child sitting here, referencing a _mommy_ , who presumably provides primary care for her, and is speaking to Nurse outside, which means that they had some kind of relationship and, more importantly, this is _real_. Like… what if Nurse is actually in a serious relationship with her? Just because he doesn’t wear a wedding ring doesn’t mean he’s not in love, doesn’t mean that he plays up the womanizing for the media and returns home to his adoring family every night.

“Poindexter looks like he’s going to keel over,” Birkholtz whispers in his not-whisper, loud enough to be heard at least half way across the room. “Think we should say something?” Dex narrows his eyes when Chow turns around to look at him, mouth tilting down and eyebrows jumping up in his classic Concerned Cop look. Normally, Dex would tell them both to fuck right off, but again, there is a child present. He’s trying to find a way to convey those feelings in more appropriate terms when the elevator dings.

Every single cop in the station turn to look at it, an expectant silence returning to the room. Dex kind of feels like he wants to throw up, which is just, super embarrassing and something he hopes he never needs to think about again. Ever.

The elevator doors slide open about a foot, before sticking, like they always do. Nurse is grinning that grin, the one that makes tension coil up and down Dex’s spine, as he eases the doors the rest of the way open. He steps out of the elevator followed by a woman who looks a hell of a lot like Nicki Minaj, and all of a sudden Dex is thinking about puking again.

“Daddy!” Angela calls, waving her arm in the air proudly. She doesn’t look like she’s going to run towards her parents or anything, which is disappointing, because Dex really doesn’t want to be involved in this whatsoever.

“Hey Angel,” Nurse says as he nears Dex’s desk, all soft and gentle. Dex glares at him, because he does not need any _feelings_ relating to this particular thorn in his side, thanks. “I see you found-“

“Detective Wilder,” the woman says, one perfect eyebrow arching, her bright pink lips curling in amusement.

“Uh?” Dex says intelligently, glancing between a possibly embarrassed looking Nurse and this woman who has yet to be introduced.

“I’m Moira Donovan,” she continues, not offering a hand to shake. Which is weird, but not quite as weird as the fact that Dex _knows_ that name. It takes all of a second for things to click.

“That’s not a real person,” Dex says, slowly, trying to ignore the way Nurse’s face lights up. “She’s from _Blood on The Beach_.”

“You’ve read my books!” Nurse practically yells, pumping a fist in the air. “I knew it!”

Dex levels him with a _look_. “I did extensive research on you before I let you tag along on cases Nurse. It just happened to include an overview of your work.” That’s a ginormous lie, and Nurse doesn’t look convinced, but Dex isn’t about to talk about it any further.

“You _are_ quick huh?” The still unnamed woman asked. “My real name is Shay Davis, and I have to say, usually Derek over exaggerates his protag’s attractiveness, but this time I think he hit the nail on the head.”

“Shay-“ Nurse starts, but Dex cuts him off.

“Is that supposed to be a compliment or?” He glances between Nurse and Shay, not exactly sure _why_ Nurse looks so completely horrified.

“Oh it’s definitely a compliment, hon,” Shay says, winking at him.

“Mommy, how long are we staying here?” Angela asks, giving Dex a chance to fully train his glare on Nurse, who seems to be distracted by making faces at the ever eavesdropping Chow and Birkoltz. He sometimes thinks he works with a bunch of children.

“We’re going now, I just needed your father to call Grammie and Abuelita,” Shay says gently, walking around the other side of Dex to stroke an elegant hand over Angela’s hair. “We’ll go hang out with them, and then Daddy and his boyfriend will meet us for dinner.”

Dex tries really, _really_ hard not to visibly react at the phrase “Daddy and his boyfriend”. He probably would have succeeded in looking unaffected, except Nurse lets out the most undignified squeak he has ever heard in his entire life.

“Oh is that not what you’re calling it?” Shay asks, face a perfect picture of innocence. If Dex didn’t feel like he was going to keel over and die right now, he’d probably like her. “Either way,” she continues, obviously ignore the way Nurse’s expression screams _Please Stop_ _For the Love of God_. “I’ll see you two at dinner.” She winks at Dex again, before hoisting Angela up onto her hip and practically sashaying back the way she came. Even the elevator seems too intimidated to mess with her, the door sliding neatly open upon command. She turns and grins at Nurse with all of her teeth as the doors slowly close. It reminds Dex of that documentary he watched on wolves that time, and the way most species show their teeth in warning. It’s scary, is what it is.

The normal chatter returns to the squad room once the doors fully close, but a tense silence hangs over Dex’s team. Or at least, the silence between Nurse and Dex is tense. Birkholtz, on the other hand, has taken on the appearance of a cat who just ate a canary, and Chow looks like he’s warring internally between outright laughing and trying to be concerned for Dex’s well-being. Nurse, it seems, has decided that now would be a great time to flip through the stupid little notebook he carries around as if he actually takes notes. Dex has never seen him write anything down, except for that one time when they drove past a Thai restaurant and Nurse wrote the words ‘my love is like an egg roll’ and that’s it.

“So you two are an item?” Birkholtz asks, finally breaking the silence. “That’s cute. I should’ve known with all the bickering.”

“We are _not_ ,” Dex growls, at the same time as Nurse, which is just… embarrassing.

“So cute!” Chow squeals, pulling his phone out of his pocket. “I need to text Cait, we have a bet going.”

“We are _not_ dating,” Dex repeats, glaring between Chow and Birkholtz. “This is just a misunderstanding, right Nurse?”

Dex is expecting an instant agreement on this one, for once. They are definitely not dating, Dex would _know_ if they were, and he certainly would have noticed if Derek Nurse had ever once asked him on a date. And sure, there’s been flirting, sometimes, but he’s always assumed it was a joke, since Nurse has always seemed to find more entertainment in the way the Dex’s ears still turn red when he’s embarrassed. And even if it was real flirting (it wasn’t though – he can’t even let himself _hope_ about things like this), flirting alone doesn’t constitute _boyfriends_.

“Well you see,” Nurse starts, dropping dramatically into the chair recently occupied by his daughter. He stretches out his legs and gives Dex this heavy lidded look, as if he’s going to attempt to use his charm and good looks to persuade Dex of something. “I’ve had a lot of experience dealing with Shay, and I’ve found it’s always easier to-“

Dex’s phone rings on his desk, thankfully cutting off whatever it is that was about to come out of Nurse’s mouth. He recognizes the number and picks it up on the second ring.

“Dr. Oluransi, please tell me you have something on that Jane Doe.”

“You sound a little stressed bro,” Dr. Oluransi, or Ransom to Dex, laughs. Dex allows himself to smile slightly, shifting in his chair so that he can smirk at the way Birkholtz is pretending like he’s not eagerly listening in on this conversation.

“Oh you know, the usual,” Dex sighs, shooting a glare at Nurse just because he can. “What do you got?”

“I’ve finished the final autopsy on your vic, if you want to come down I’ll give you the scoop.”

“Okay, be right there.” Dex stands as he hangs up and grabs the case file for the Jane Doe found in an alley the day before. “Got an update on the case,” he says sharply, walking briskly towards the elevator without looking at his team. They all follow him anyways, Birkholtz scrambling to be first, Chow making sure he has his notes and that their desk drawers are locked. Nurse generally follows behind him, exchanging pleasantries with the other detectives as he passes. Today though, Dex can practically feel him breathing down the back of his neck, which is distinctly uncomfortable and definitely doesn’t like, turn him on or any nonsense like that. Obviously.

“Listen Poindexter,” Nurse says, as Dex presses the button for the morgue. “I need you to do this for me.” He’s talking quieter than normal, almost whispering, like he doesn’t want Birkholtz and Chow to hear. That in of itself is strange, seeing as generally Nurse likes to have as many people laughing at his jokes as possible.

“Do what?” Dex asks, at a normal volume because he’s not a fucking child, okay. They can talk about things like grown-ups.

“You _know_ what.”

“I do _not_. Please talk to me like a grown-up!”

“You’re a fucking detective bro, this should be mad easy for you to figure out.”

“Did you just say _mad easy_ Nurse? Really? Are we sixteen?”

“Alright firstly, _chill_ Poindexter, and secondly-“

“He wants you to pretend to be his boyfriend,” Chow cuts in, clearly unimpressed with their arguing. “Birkholtz was right about the bickering good god.”

“No.” Dex barks, beyond relieved when the elevator doors slide open and he can march right out, and hopefully away from this entire mess.

“ _Yes_ ,” Nurse says, following right on Dex’s heels. “Shay’s trying to break me, she’s trying to get me to admit that… that I… that we’re _not_ dating.”

“This is just… wild, Nurse, even for you,” Dex huffs as he pushes open the door to the morgue, kind of hoping that maybe Nurse will shut up out of respect for the dead. It’s unlikely, but a man can dream.

“All I need is you to pretend like you actually like me for one night,” Nurse _whines_ , letting out a little huff when Dex lets the door slam on his face. He does it pretty much every time they go to the morgue, and usually Nurse throws a little fit about it. Today though, he seems to be much more concerned with batting his eyelashes at Dex. As if that’s going to do anything.

“ _No_ , it doesn’t work like that. There’s consequences for _everything_ Nurse!” Dex shoots over his shoulder, stomping towards Ransom, who looks like he might be regretting calling them down here in the first place. “Your moms are going to be there Nurse, I _know_ them, and I’ve met them on several occasions. How are you going to explain this to them? And what about Angela? Do I get to be the bad guy who dumped her dad once you make up a story about why I’m not attending every fucking family function?”

“ _Wow_ ,” Chow mutters under his breath. Dex shoots him a glare anyways, because he can, and because Chow is supposed to be on his side. Brothers in Blue, or whatever.

“Yo chill for a second,” Nurse says. Dex’s left eyelid starts to twitch. “I will fill my moms in beforehand, and Shay already said it in front of Angela, so the damage is done there. You and me pal, we’re doin’ this. Love you long time, baby.”

Dex just stares at him for a minute, hoping that maybe his glare will break Nurse’s resolve. If anything he starts grinning wider, which is not only frightening but super annoying. Like, Dex kinda of wants to push him up against a wall and wipe that smug smile right off his face. With his mouth. Wait. No, wait, this isn’t-

“What’s cookin’ good lookin’?” Birkholtz asks Ransom, pulling Dex out of his traitorous thoughts.

“I did just incinerate Mr. Allen for his family,” Ransom replies, deadpan. Dex’s lips twitch, but Birkholtz apparently doesn’t know how to take it, leaning back too hard on one of the empty tables and sending it careening across the room. For once Birkholtz is the one blushing, and Dex deeply regrets having to be the mature one of the group when all he wants to do is laugh.

“Anyways,” Chow cuts in, arms folded tight across his chest. He shoots a look at Ransom, whose serious mask finally cracks with a wide grin.

“You guys are a hot mess today,” he laughs, reaching for the sheet covering the lone body in the morgue and pulling it back. Dex immediately sobers at the sight before him, a young girl, late teens at the oldest, a string of bruises around her neck and scratches across her face. “I was able to pull her prints to run through the databases. If that doesn’t work we can try dental records, she’s got some pretty unique work that was done, so hopefully I can make a match.”

“Good,” Dex nods, open the file he brought with him and glancing down at his notes from yesterday. “Do we have a cause of death?”

“Strangulation,” Ransom says solemnly, pointing to the bruises around her neck. “Looks like it was done with bare hands. I was able to collect some DNA from under her nails, she appears to have fought off her attacker. No signs of sexual assault, and all of her clothing was still intact. I’ve bagged it up for you to take to the forensic team.”

“Thanks Rans,” Dex smiles. “You’re the best.”

“Yeah you are,” Birkholtz offers. Dex fights back the urge to cover his face with his hands.

“Damn straight,” Ransom says, winking right at Borkholtz, who promptly turns red again and manages to trip over his own feet. “Now all of you get out of here, your drama is making me nervous.”

Dex grabs Birkholtz by the elbow, glares at Nurse and heads for the door, helpfully held open by Chow. Their drama make him _aggravated_ , that’s what their drama does.

* * *

 

Dex manages to actually forget about Nurse and his ridiculous scheme for most of the day. They’ve got a murder to solve, and today Dex has a handful of potential witnesses to interview and plans to show Jane Doe’s photo around at some of the shops near where she was found. Nurse trails along with him like he usually does, offering suggestions that Dex begrudgingly admits are often helpful, and spending most of his time texting Chow. Probably. At least that’s what Dex gathers by the random snorts of laughter and the occasional embarrassing picture of Birkholtz that gets shoved in his face. While he’s driving. Because Nurse is an idiot.

They actually manage to find a bartender at a club that remembered the victim from two nights ago, but by the time their shift is coming to an end, that’s about all they’ve got. With the lab still working on matching fingerprints and working on extracting DNA from the fingernail scrapings, Dex is about ready to call it a day. He might as well try and get a good night’s sleep while he can, before this case really gets rolling and he starts working until the early hours of the morning. Images of the blanket on his couch and his Netflix queue are dancing in his head as he packs up his desk, when Nurse clears his throat.

“So, you’ll come by the apartment at seven then?” He’s got the smarmy smirk on his face that kind of makes Dex want to punch something.

“ _No_.”

“Dude, what am I going to say to Angel when my boyfriend ditches us for dinner?” His grin gets wider when Dex narrows his eyes.

“Not fair, you can’t use your kid like that.”

“Mamá’s making tacos, homemade tortillas and everything,” Nurse waggles his eyebrows. “They’re Angela’s favorite, so she’s making them special.” Dex tries to ignore the way his stomach rumbles with interest. Rosa makes the best damn tortillas. She made them for Dex once when he stopped by looking for Nurse one afternoon.

“Alright fine,” Dex concedes. Out of the corner of his eye, he sees Birkholtz and Chow share a smirk. Assholes. “But I’m only doing this for the food, and your daughter. Not for you.”

“Whatever you say man,” Nurse says easily, wrapping an arm around Dex’s shoulders when he stands. “It’s mad chill.”

“ _You’re_ mad annoying.”

“ _You_ love it.”

Dex can’t seem to find the words to dispute that.

* * *

 

His hands are sweating.

This is a fake date, with his fake boyfriend, and his _real_ hands are sweating.

Agreeing to this was stupid. Dex long ago learned how to guard his heart, how to appreciate the beautiful people but never fall for them. He knows what he looks like, knows that he’s tall and athletic and an average looking face. This isn’t a pity party, he’s dated a couple of people, had two long term, Big Deal relationships, with people he still considers beautiful. But there’s beautiful for the average person, like the popular kids in high school, and then there’s _beautiful_ , like Derek Nurse.

Dex fell in love with him halfway through _Murder in Manhatten._ The way he writes captivates Dex, somehow mixing flowery metaphors with down to earth dialogue, making it easy to crawl inside the protagonist’s skin and _live_ the mystery. He didn’t even pay attention to the author’s name until he got to the end of the book and saw the photograph inside the back cover.

It was all downhill from there.

When Sgt. Duan called Dex into her office over a year ago, he should have _known_ disaster was coming. He wasn’t prepared for the epitome of tall, dark and handsome sitting on the corner of Duan’s desk, wasn’t prepared for the soft green eyes and lazy, perfect smile. He wasn’t prepared for the jaw line or the five o’clock shadow at nine in the morning.

Dex tried being an asshole to cover up the fact that his literary crush was supposedly going to be shadowing him for the foreseeable future. Of course the fact that he’s naturally kind of a dick made that easy, and apparently, made Derek Nurse want to _aggravate_ him as much as possible. So much so, that they’ve reached the point where Dex is apparently going to _pretend_ to be his boyfriend for the night.

This is easily rock bottom. Easily.

Wiping his hands one last time on his jeans, Dex raises his fist and knocks. An ominous silence follows, broken after a moment by a loud laugh and the click of high heels on hardwood. The door swings open to reveal Shay, her long, dark hair pulled up on top of her head and dressed in what appears to be a hot pink sweat suit. It strangely works for her, but Dex is more concerned with the almost evil look she has on her face.

“Baby you made it!” Nurse practically sings from inside the apartment. Dex can see him sitting at the kitchen counter with a glass of red wine, Rosa rolling out tortillas and Renee sitting at the stool beside him. He has to physically fight to keep the grimace off his face at the endearment, but offers Shay the bottle of wine he brought anyways. It’s probably not even that _good_ , but he generally sticks to beer, and honestly Nurse can afford to buy his own god damn overpriced wine.

“Hello… Buttercup,” he settles on, mostly to see the way Nurse struggles not to laugh. Not that he _likes_ Nurse’s laugh, or has any opinions whatsoever on any of those laughs. It’s actually kind of hard not to laugh himself, though that quickly gives way to panic when he realizes he’s going to have to greet Nurse… physically.

Renee rescues him, gesturing for a hug and pulling him in tight. She smells like lavender, and even though it’s probably some high dollar perfume, hugging Renee never fails to make him miss his own mother. Mom always smelled like lavender and warm dirt, skin warm from the spring sunshine and hair frizzing in the humidity. It hurts less to think about her now, even though he will never admit to Nurse how much his moms have helped him with that. He walks around the counter to press a kiss to Rosa’s cheek, laughing when she leaves a fingerprint of flour on the tip of his nose. Locking eyes with Nurse he finally approaches, cheeks getting redder with every step.

“Long time no see,” Nurse murmurs, like it’s some kind of intimate thing to say. It’s _not_ , but Dex feels hot all over anyways, and suddenly there’s a warm hand curled around the back of his neck and soft lips pressed against the corner of his mouth. All too soon it’s over, just the slight scratch of Nurse’s beard and his fingerprints like brands on the back of his neck remaining.

“Detective Dex!” He looks down at the sound of Angela’s voice. She’s got a sword made from paper towel rolls in each hand, wearing a Spiderman suit with a pink tutu over it. “Daddy said you’d play with me.”

“Oh really?” Dex asks as he takes one of the proffered swords. Angela nods solemnly as she grabs a hold of his sleeve and tugs. He follows her into the normally immaculate living room, now in total disarray, with pillows and blankets strewn about. “So what do we have going on here?” He asks, dropping down to one knee.

Angela’s face lights up as she begins to explain, a universe full of superhero princesses and knights in shining space ships and dragons that are good, not bad. She assigns Dex the role of Princess Margot, complete with a blanket cape and a dragon to ride from battle to battle. Angela herself is a knight by day, vigilante by night, captain of a spaceship _and_ rider of horses. It’s easy, to slip into her world, only vaguely aware of the soft conversation happening in the other room. Dex has done this many times, with his youngest siblings and then his cousins, now his nieces and nephews when he manages to make it home for the holidays. A child’s imagination and wonder are magical and contagious, and Dex had kind of forgotten how _good_ it felt to just pretend.

He’s in the middle of getting _eviscerated_ by Sir Angela (which is weird, because he’s almost positive they are on the same side, but apparently not, judging by the number of times he’s been hit with cardboard), when he glimpses Nurse out of the corner of his eye. He’s standing by the end of the couch, arms crossed like he’s trying to be tough but his eyes soft and crinkling in the corners. Dex immediately finds himself smiling back, instinctively, because who could _not_ in the face of all that genuine beauty.

“Hey,” Nurse says when he catches him looking. And _fuck_ , Dex is still smiling and he’s got Nurse’s daughter giggling against his chest and he’s in way to fucking deep here. “Dinner’s ready.”

“Sir Angela,” Dex starts, in his absolutely terrible English accent. “The court jester has announced dinner, would you like to accompany me to the banquet hall.” Angela giggles but scrambles to her feet, holding out her hand like she’s going to pull Dex up off the floor. After a second’s consideration he takes it, pretending to let her pull as he heaves himself up. If Nurse is at all impressed, he hides it well.

Dinner goes surprisingly well. The food is of course amazing, everything Rosa makes always is, and everyone is surprisingly pleasant. Shay and Nurse trade a few pointed barbs, but they seem to get along a lot better than most exes do. Angela is of course the highlight, happily recounting her and Dex’s adventures for her grandmothers, and even singing them all a song she made up. She gets Nurse to sing back-up vocals for her, and Dex has never laughed so hard in his entire life.

 _I’m royally fucked_ , he thinks to himself as he stands at the sink with Nurse, drying the dishes while Nurse washes. He can hear Angela and Renee giggling in the background, can smell cilantro still lingering in the air and the muted scent of Nurse’s cologne. For the first time in a long time, Dex _wants_.

“I’ll walk you to the door,” Nurse says, later, as Dex makes his excuses to leave. Or they’re not really excuses, because there’s still a case to solve and he needs to be at the station early tomorrow morning. He wants to say no, to kiss Nurse on the cheek while he’s sitting on the couch and call it a day, but it’s too late now. Nurse’s fingers are cold now when they curl around his wrist, pulling him to a stop just inside the door. His eyes are darker than usual and intense, and it might be the wine or maybe the night but suddenly this all feels very real.

“Well uh, I’ll see you tomorrow,” Dex offers, swallowing hard. Nurse smirks and takes a step closer, somehow managing to get tangled up on Shay’s high heels laying on the floor and pitching forward into Dex. He catches him, because of course he does, but now he’s got Derek Nurse all up in his personal space.

“I just fell for you,” Nurse says, and Dex wants to punch him, a little bit, but mostly he wants to kiss him.

So he does.

It’s different than their first kiss of the evening, slow and purposeful and warm. Nurse tastes like red wine but kisses like whiskey, burning at first and leaving a warm glow in his wake. Dex wants to kiss him forever, wants to get his hands in his hair and bite his plush bottom lip. But there’s four other people watching him, and this isn’t supposed to be their first real kiss, they’re supposed to have already done this, so Dex pulls away.

“You’re a dork,” he whispers, and it comes out hoarse and throaty and all together embarrassing. He presses one last kiss to the corner of Nurse’s mouth, because he can, before yanking the door open and pulling it quickly shut behind him.

It takes less than five minutes for his phone to buzz in his pocket while he’s tucked in the backseat of a cab.

 **NURSE:** Shay could tell we weren’t dating :( #epicfail

Dex sighs and leans his head back against the seat. The only thing this night proved was that he is helplessly in love with Derek Nurse, and that he apparently really likes kissing him.

 **ME:** am I allowed to say I told you so?

 **NURSE:** fuck you Princess Dex

Dex considers typing ‘any time’ as he climbs the stairs to his apartment, but all it does is make him think about it, about getting his mouth on Nurse’s abs and his collarbones, about learning all the things he likes.

 **ME:** go to bed Nurse. We have work to do in the morning.

He settles on the mundane, safe text while stripping out of his clothes. For the first time in years his bed feels lonely as he crawls into it, too cold and too big. There’s nothing on TV to distract him either, the news too depressing and all the other shows not catching his interest. So he lays down and he thinks about it, thinks about holding Nurse’s hand and teaching Angela how to ride a bike. He imagines taking Renee and Rosa to his mother’s grave, whispering to his mom that he’s found people that love him. It hurts, a bit, but in a good way, he supposes.

In the morning, he will have to see Nurse again, and act like everything is normal. In the morning, he will look at Nurse and try not to think about the taste of his lips. In the morning, he’ll gratefully accept the Americano Nurse brings him and think nothing of the implications.

But tonight, he can dream.

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for reading!  
> you can find me on [tumblr](http://dexsnursey.tumblr.com)


End file.
